Unemployemnt

This is the life. I can sleep in. Stay in my pj's till noon everyday, even job hunt in my pj's. Chat on the phone with friends anytime. Surf the web all day if I want to. Catch up on my daytime tv. (I don't even know what's on tv in the daytime any more so I suppose this isn't really an option.) You might think my house would be spotless now that I'm home, nope it's not, I'm still ignoring the dishes really well. And, the money will eventually run out. My heat & ac have been on more since I'm home, so the bills might go up. My gas tank stays full longer though because I'm not going as many places. But I guess none of this is really being a responsible adult. In many regards I'm liking being home during the day but it does have it's down sides, no money is a big downside. That must mean that it's time for me to get moving on my next "life chapter."

I am thinking grad school. I spoke to the department director at the University of Utah yesterday about the program I think I want to study. I do have a year of prerequisites to complete and the GRE to take before even applying to the masters program. (Suggestions on where to find a good GRE prep class or book?) The soonest I could get into the program is Fall '08 which is fine. I do want to contact USU and BYU to get more information about their programs and then decide from there which school. USU is the cheapest between the 3 schools but it might require me to move to Logan or commute to Ogden. Not working (or working part-time) and school full-time is a big enough challenge right now, I'm not so sure that I want to add the stress of moving. The U's close (about 10 minutes away), I wouldn't be busy commuting or moving and could easily find a pt job in the SLC area. But theirs is the most expensive program and since tuition will be paid by student loans, the less I have to pay to the school, the more I have for living expenses and the more I have to eventually pay back.

Yesterday I looked for some part-time jobs on line and found a number I was interested in and many were decent hourly rates too! I know I need to look for a position somewhere but until I know where I'm going to school, and if I'm moving, I feel like I need to wait to apply for jobs. Maybe I'm just making excuses to keep avoiding the inevitable.

Don't misunderstand, I am excited about the graduate school option, worried too but mostly excited. Somehow it just feels like such a big change and I've gotten really comfortable where I am. (Probably too comfortable which would explain the sudden and drastic changes recently.) Man, 10 years ago I probably wouldn't have though twice about this opportunity and would jumped at the chance and said I thrive on change. Now, I'm way more cautious and unsure. More of a fuddy-duddy, I suppose. Sometimes I hate getting older.

Part of me just thinks I need to just jump off the deep end and go for it. I'm really not sure what's holding me back and wish I could figure it out so that I can get over it, make a decision and move on! Luckily, I think I'm really close to the point of final decisions and the next chapter.